It's Sunday morning and no church today. My wife is out town and she took the hair dryer! How am I supposed to get two little princesses ready for church with no freaking hair dryer? I feel pretty sure that she did not expect me to even entertain the idea of wrestling three kids to church all by my lonesome, oh well. I guess God will have to wait until next week. Maybe he will understand, after all, he created the little turds! (Turd is an affectionate term in my house.)
My 2 year old son, M, is now climbing in the fireplace! Literally climbing all the way in, sitting down and pulling the screen curtain closed. What a jackass! I hope that when the gas logs finally get installed he does not try that! I threatened beatings if he did it again, but he is my son, so it went in one ear and out the other. Of course my oldest, SJ, is the informer and not so much the enforcer. "Daddy! M is in the fireplace!!" "Well, get him out." "But Daddy, he doesn't listen to me!" "SJ, get your brother out of the fireplace!" Yet again, another item to add to the list of things I never thought I would hear myself say. Like, "F, stop licking that car!" She has a bad habit of licking cars when it rains. "Get your finger out of your sisters butt" is another favorite. I teach students in an Army school for a living right now, and I am not sure if I talk to my kids like the students or if I talk to students like my kids, but here is a similarity that happens daily at both places. "Get dressed! Hurry up! FIVE, FOUR, THREE, TWO........" Hurry up and eat! Finish those eggs before getting up from the table, you wanted 'em, now eat 'em, ONE, TWO THREE......" "What did I say? Didn't I just tell you not to do that? Then why in the WORLD did you do it? Are you brain dead or just trying to make me crazy?" "Hey, we are on your time, if you don't finish you don't get......." See what I mean, it's all the same. Even "WOW! You stink! Go get a bath/shower now! And brush your teeth!" But, I love doing both. It's lots of fun and there is always something to laugh about.
So, I am investigating this guy at work for beating his old lady, kids, and every other female he has been involved with in the past 15 years. This guy has more of a crap trail than the honey truck on Camp Victory, Iraq! What a tool! I found where this guy has beaten up a couple of his wives and even plead guilty to beating up a 13 year old boy that was not his!!!!! Anyway, I spent all of this time gathering evidence and basically doing what should have been done years ago to put this guy out of Army, only to take the case file to the prosecuting attorneys to have the department chief tell me he is overworked and understaffed and did not have time to Courts Martial this guy. The SOB did not even look at ANY of the evidence I had put together, he said "I have heard about this case, I know all about it." I hope some adult kicks the shit out of one of his kids one day and he has a daughter that marries an abusive man. (Not really, but it would be poetic justice.) I did not bother to tell him the last time I was overworked and understaffed I was also under fire in 130 degree heat and did not have any sympathy for him at all. I need to go to law school so I can get paid for sitting around in a AC'ed office and telling people what they CAN'T do. This guy will make a great DA one day, only take the cases that are a slam dunk so you can have a 100% conviction rate. After all, DA's are politicians.
This blog thing is cool. You can talk about people! So if your name is Jeff, you are the chief of a criminal law section in a JAG office in the Army, go jump in the local river and float away like the turd that you are. (Note: the use of the term "turd" in not in an affectionate manner here.)
RLTW,
rmeman
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