16 September 2007

Marine Wives, Dead People, and Taxes Vs. Texas


During our recent visit Trish and I experiences another "Christie Phenomenon". Which simply simply means that someone across the street from us died. Seriously, just died. Let me take you back to about FEB 07. Christie and her husband are living next door to Trish and I on Fort Benning, GA while attending a school there. Well, one evening they come banging on our door telling us to come watch the action across the street. After the MP's storm troop the house, well more like Key Stone Cop/Three Ring Circus the house, they discovered that some new 2LT had murdered his wife and killed himself. Very tragic incident indeed. Somehow I had a feeling Christie's presence was the "drama magnet". I had nothing to back that up, until last week. Trish and I checked in to our hotel after we arrived at Brian and Christie's, and no shit, ONE HOUR LATER some old dude takes the long nap right outside our balcony across the street. Paramedics and everything. The people that walked by were like "Dude, a dead guy. Cool, let's go surf." Trish and I just took pictures and critiqued their CPR. We're so going to hell. Especially if these paramedics are doing the CPR! So we called Christie on the phone and asked her WTF and how does she have the power to make people die so much. When she figured out I was serious, that there was for real a dead dude across the street she replied "OOOOO! OK, I'm almost there! I am around the corner!" At which time I heard tires squalling both over the phone and down the street. Girl meant she wasn't going to miss nothin'. So she makes it up there and goes bananas because she forgot her ever present camera, but she calmed down and enjoyed the show when she found out that Trish had already taken pictures. Three grown adults watching a poor dead dude being worked on like it was the first R rated movie we had ever seen.
I braved the elements and took my three kids to eat Chinese and then to Kohl's today. The conversation between my 7 and 4 year old girls was absolutely riveting. At about 1230 SayJay: "Wouldn't it be cool if we moved back to Fort Campbell, and I could see Mrs Barlow again?" Fletch: "Yeah, and you could see Caroline again too!" SayJay: "No, she moved to Texas." Now it's 1330 and the girls and I are in the car waiting on Trish and Mel to come out of the Chinese place while we are listening to the blues station on XM radio. The lyrics come across "........that's what I pay my taxes fo....." Fletch: " Taxes, what's a taxes?" SayJay: "No dummy, she moved to TEXAS, not TAXES!" Fletch: "Oh". Were the hell in SayJays mind she got that we were still talking about Caroline an hour later when nobody had even mentioned her name, I have no idea. And how Fletch accepted that answer without even saying "WTF?" to SayJay, I have no idea. See what I have to live with? But the good new is, is that I got some new shoes and a pair of workout pants out of the deal.
Later on in Target: SayJay to Trish while buying SayJay the pair of boots she had a flying shitfit over: "Mommy, you are so good at shopping for me! And Daddy, well he's good at....at.....at....KILLING!" Great. Now I'm the Great While Killer, in the middle of Target. At least we got quick check out service!
RLTW

3 comments:

Killjoy said...

OhhMaGod. I end up having to read these post outloud to Brian, they're that good. I don't know how I do that whole death thing, it is kinda crazy isn't it?

rmeman said...

You and Trish should get a job in the same ER, half of LA would be dead in a week! (LA could be either Los Angeles or Lower Alabama, depending on the job venune.)

rmeman said...
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